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June 17, 2022

Consider This The Second-Last Straw Oh Night Beast

L. Dacre Tynan

Dear, contemptuously caustic collector,


How many times must you and

I play these confounding roles?


By your laborious thievery

And the spiteful chirruping of your dump-truck reversing

You have eroded all Tranquillity

We are very beeping mad


Your head office has been called repeatedly

We’ve sent scathing emails–twice to be exact

Surely you’ve been told

by your superiors


This is utter donkey work

for one to collect the trash at four in the morning


The bins have been chained shut–hang ‘who they belong to’


Let this be your first and last

A direct warning missive

Only upon your return after sun-up, they will be unlocked


This scrimmage ends tonight

Now leave silently from whence you came, Night Beast


In advance, yours arguably ~

One not at all afraid to start a dumpster fire.


(1) L. Dacre Tynan's first name means 'light' in Latin, his surname translates to 'dark' from Old Welsh.

(2) He was peer-voted as '2nd most funniest,' in his final year of High School.

(3) His background in Optical Mechanics, copywriting & content work give him a shallow basis on which he can call himself a writer...yet he does!

(4) This is his second piece of 'official' poetry (the first as the sole creator).

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